05-14-09

♣♫◙...Umpisa ng araw...◙♫♣

asar + asar = isang malaking BADTRIP

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04-29-09

HOW FIGHTS START

My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels.

She asked, 'What's on TV?'

I said, 'Dust.'

And then the fight started...

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My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds.'

I bought her a scale.

And then the fight started...

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When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive... so, I took her to a gas station.

And then the fight started...

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After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.

The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application.

When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office.

She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too.'

And then the fight started...

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My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table.

My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'

'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.'

'My God!' says my wife, 'who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?'

And then the fight started...

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I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.

"I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please."

He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?""

Nah, she can order for herself."

And then the fight started...

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A woman is standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband, 'I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.'

The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's damn near perfect.'

And then the fight started.....

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I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Miller Light for $14.95. Instead, she bought a jar of cold cream for $7.95.

I told her the beer would make her look better at night than the cold cream.

And then the fight started....

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My wife asked me if a certain dress made her butt look big. I told her not as much as the dress she wore yesterday

and then the fight started.....

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A man and a woman were asleep like two innocent babies.

Suddenly, at 3 o'clock in the morning, a loud noise came from outside.

The woman, bewildered, jumped up from the bed and yelled at the man 'Holy crap. That must be my husband!'

So the man jumped out of the bed; scared and naked jumped out the window. He smashed himself on the ground, ran through a thorn bush and to his car as fast as he could go.

A few minutes later he returned and went up to the bedroom and screamed at the woman, 'I AM your husband!'

The woman yelled back, 'Yeah, then why were you running?'

And then the fight started.....

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Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, grabbed the dog, and slipped quietly into the garage.

I hooked up the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour.

The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day.

I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed.

I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, 'The weather out there is terrible.'

My loving wife of 10 years replied, 'Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?'

And then the fight started ...

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I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary? "

It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said.

So I suggested, "How about the kitchen?"

And that's when the fight started....

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My wife and I are watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed. I turned to her and said, "Do you want to have sex?"

"No," she answered.

I then said, "Is that your final answer?"

She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying "Yes."

So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."

And that's when the fight started....

04-11-09

Eto sabado rest day from work. Dito lng ako sa bahay kachat ang pinsan ko, habang katxt sa chikka ang parents ko. Tinutulungan ko pinsan ko problem nya sa YM hndi makalogin, hirap pala maging tech lalo na hndi rin ako yung tipo na techy person hehehe. eto sa ngyn tinuturuan ko xa gumamit muna ng meebo at hndi ko alam kng anong ngyyari sa Yahoo Messenger nya kht na na uninstall and install na namin ganun parin, hayy.. buti nga at matyaga itong pinsan ko, hndi rin xa msydo marunong sa computer, basic na pag gamit lng ang alam nya. ang gamit lng nyang pangchat sakin e yung sa yahoo mail kaya wlang webcam, e ang kelangn nya yung sa webcam dahil nga pag kinakausp nya yung family nya sa pinas, nga pla na sa europe siya, at this point nasa holland. after nito manonood ako ng 24 (jack bauer) isang episode lng kc hihintayin ko pa husband ko para sabay kami manood hindi ako pwede mauna ng episode at baka magtampo hehe. after ko manood 24, balik nanaman ako online youtube naman ang pagddiskitahan ko hehe.. ok, kauspin ko muna tong pinsan ko.. Peace.. Chillax.

Cyanide and Happiness: I Love Noodles

Sven Geier Fractal Art

Cyanide and Happiness: Sucks to be you

03-03-09

Yesterday I was about to visit my blog and write something but i got stocked on watching America's Next Top Model. I started watching cycle 12 but what was uploaded on Youtube was only until 6th episode. Since I wasn't doing much here at the office I decided to watch it from cycle 1 and now I'm on cycle 3. Since I started watching ANTM i have lost interest in watching 24, and maybe one reason also i lost interest is because of my husband, we watch 24 everynight like 2-3 episode and after that we go to sleep as i have to wake up early. Well, the next thing I knew was, he is 3 episodes ahead of me. So I let him watch 24 and maybe this saturday I will catch up where I left. Now he is like 8 episodes ahead of me. Now i have to end this and start watching, LOL.

Chillax. Peace

April Fools' Day

April Fools' Day or All Fools' Day, although not a holiday in its own right, is a notable day celebrated in many countries on April 1. The day is marked by the commission of hoaxes and other practical jokes of varying sophistication on friends, family members, enemies, and neighbors, or sending them on fool's errand, the aim of which is to embarrass the gullible. Traditionally, in some countries, the jokes only last until noon: like UK, Australia, New Zealand and Canada, someone who plays a trick after noon is called an "April Fool". Elsewhere, such as in Ireland, France, and the USA, the jokes last all day.

3-30-09

Good morning. It's monday again, back to work. I'm already here at work. The women who clean and make coffee for the firm every morning is not here. She won't be present for the next two weeks, that means we have to do some chores of her chores while she's out. And in this case, i just water the plants and made a coffee. It's not the first time that i made coffee for them but they surely didn't like it (LOL). I'm not a coffee drinker, actually i don't drink coffee but i know how to make one but not their kind of coffee, (hahaha). it will only be two things, either the coffee i made is too sweet ot too strong which both means it sucks. Anyway enough of the coffee stuff.

Just now, before i started writing this i opened firefox and continue the game i was playing last friday. I'm guessing that this day will be the same as before, boring. It's all good, it's fine as long as i have a job (what's my jobe? play online, watch youtube and be on YM all day, haha).

Well nothing more to say here. Have a nice day. Chillax. Peace.

3-29-09

Hey, it's been a long time since i haven't visit my blog or even posted one.

It's sunday i just woke up around 3pm, still don't have plans for today maybe just watch something here at home. My husband is in the room playing guitar. Oh yeah yesterday we went to some skate shops mostly at blanari 21. We saw this guy playing guitar on the street and people passing by give him money. He's got a nice voice. after that we went to baneasa to buy shoes for jam but unfortunately the want he wants was already taken.

f*ck i'll get back soon, i have to clean the poo of my dog.

chillax. peace ;)

Happy Tree Friends : LUMPY

Lumpy. Always the odd-man-out, this dim-witted blue moose is all heart and all thumbs.

Lumpy is a blue male moose with clean teeth pronging out of his mouth, bright disorbited eyes and mismatched antlers. Lumpy is one of the four primary characters in the series.Known to be the big brother, or perhaps babysitter, of many of the other characters, he usually means well but he is extremely stupid. Furthermore, he screams like a girl. He is not so reliable at times and tends to mess things up a lot.

Bread Body Parts

In Ratchaburi Thailand, bread body parts are being sold. Made by 28 years old local baker Kittiwat Unarrom a graduate of painting and sculpture. His mother was a baker and he started making bread body parts as a part of a university competition. Now because of huge demand, he spends six hours a day baking. The bread is perfectly edible and sells for up to $500 per body part depending on size.

Emoticon War

This is cool. I can relate with this, or shall I say we instant messaging user can relate on this.

Earth Hour 2009

This year, Earth Hour has been transformed into the world’s first global election, between Earth and global warming.

For the first time in history, people of all ages, nationalities, race and background have the opportunity to use their light switch as their vote – Switching off your lights is a vote for Earth, or leaving them on is a vote for global warming. WWF are urging the world to VOTE EARTH and reach the target of 1 billion votes, which will be presented to world leaders at the Global Climate Change Conference in Copenhagen 2009.

This meeting will determine official government policies to take action against global warming, which will replace the Kyoto Protocol. It is the chance for the people of the world to make their voice heard.

Earth Hour began in Sydney in 2007, when 2.2 million homes and businesses switched off their lights for one hour. In 2008 the message had grown into a global sustainability movement, with 50 million people switching off their lights. Global landmarks such as the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco, Rome’s Colosseum, the Sydney Opera House and the Coca Cola billboard in Times Square all stood in darkness.

In 2009, Earth Hour is being taken to the next level, with the goal of 1 billion people switching off their lights as part of a global vote. Unlike any election in history, it is not about what country you’re from, but instead, what planet you’re from. VOTE EARTH is a global call to action for every individual, every business, and every community. A call to stand up and take control over the future of our planet. Over 74 countries and territories have pledged their support to VOTE EARTH during Earth Hour 2009, and this number is growing everyday.

We all have a vote, and every single vote counts. Together we can take control of the future of our planet, for future generations.

VOTE EARTH by simply switching off your lights for one hour, and join the world for Earth Hour.

Saturday, March 28, 8:30-9:30pm. (http://www.earthhour.org/)

Kids

I was talking to my best friend on the messenger earlier. She showed me some funny
videos of kids. Cute, funny and very innocent. Well, kids will be kids. thanks to Diana Tan

I also added this one. Look at the reaction of the boy.

Chow Tips

Chow tips, shows how to open a bottle of beer using what you usually have with you or at home, in case you don't have a bottle opener. You can open a bottle of beer by using a PEN, PAPER, with your FOREARM, with another BEER or with a CARABINER. Well with opening with another beer is common and with a carabiner also as well as using a spoon or your teeth. But let's see the other ways. Pretty interesting.

Happy Tree Friends : HANDY

Handy
There's no job too big for this amputee, beaver carpenter. He's always eager to
lend a helping limb and proves that you can do anything with the right attitude.

Handy is an orange male beaver, with unexplained amputated arms. The stumps are covered with bandages. Handy is a construction worker and wears a tool belt and a hard hat (the typical dress of most construction workers). His dam mostly consists of tools that are operated by hand. He is also the second character without visible ears.